Dear Diary:
Today, I sat around watching tv and saw alot of ridiculous personal injury attorney commercials. I can’t look down on them because the only pedestal I stand on is one of unemployment. Then I got to thinking, these guys are shitting in tall cotton and they think of all sorts of ways to market themselves: on the back of buses, on urinal cakes, in dicey newspapers, on condom wrappers (saw one for a divorce lawyer), in late night commercials with a rhyming motto, etc.
I’m a lawyer, why can’t I be squirly and wiley?
So I sat around and thought of ways I could market myself creatively.
I thought about going to Target, Bed Bath and Beyond, West Elm, Ikea, etc. and going to their photo frame section and replacing all the sample photos with one of my own with my name and number and “ATTORNEY FOR HIRE”. I could even make a copy of my diploma and slip it into the diploma frames with my name and number and my resume on the back.
I even thought about going to Tiffany’s and looking through their nice collection of business card holders and slipping in one of my business cards (the free ones I printed off of Vistaprint.com) with my name and number. I might get thrown out. I might not. And you know the people who are still shopping around for Tiffany’s business card holders got the dough.
If any of you do this, please make sure to comment here and let me know how that goes for ya. ha.
But then I just sat around and registered with temp contract attorney positions on the web.
I’m glad I went to a top law school and graduated at the top of my class and mucked through law review for this.
On the upside, I drank today.
–your drunk laid off buddy
*Posted March 31, 2009
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