[Ed: This is the first in what should be a recurring regular column from an eccentric GC who spent his formative years in the central highlands of Vietnam]
We, the willing, led by the unknowing, are doing the impossible for the ungrateful. We have done so much for so long with so little, we are now capable of doing anything with nothing
- Military proverb
It’s a war out here, boys. Every day. I’m not talking about the cushy life of the “bigshot” BigLaw partners.
I’m talking about the real front lines of being a lawyer. General counsel of a major corporation.
I’m beset on all sides.
I answer to the CEO, the board, and the stockholders, not to mention regulators, politicians, unions, media, and customers. Tell me, exactly which of them do you think gives a shit about the dues at my country club going up? I don’t have some magical “hourly rate” to crank up whenever that happens.
Unlike private practice, I can’t spin PPP and RPL out of whole cloth. I’ve got to show CBAs to the CFO and the CPAs have to sign off on everything we file with the SEC.
I’ve got deputy GCs conspiring to take my job, outside counsel trying to insinuate themselves between me and my CEO and board, business units who don’t want to pay for anything, and a CFO who’s trying to steal my responsibilities.
But I’ve fought my way to the top, I know where the skeletons are, and I’m not afraid to use them.
It’s me, Phyllis, and Gladys (whose perfume is bothering me, so I sent her out to work from a bench in the hallway this morning) against the world.
Stick around and you might learn something.
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